Life is too short...

My heart is heavy... Life is so short. My Uncle Johnny died today. He was such a great man. What I remember the best about him is that he was always there to help others... He was always taking care of his mom. He was a son, a husband, a father... and many of other things to many people. It is just so sad... There are so many unanswered questions... All I know is his wife came home from work and found him in the backyard. The police are treating his death as a homicide. Hopefully, there will be some answered questions soon. But it won't take the pain away that his loved ones are feeling.

Since I found out about his death about 2 hours ago my mind has been racing in every direction... I'm worried about my family... praying for everyone... wishing I was home with my family... thinking about how short life is and compiling a list in my mind of people in my mind that I need to be sure to spend time with. My granddad... my great-grandmother... And at this very moment... should I reach out to my father...

I don't know... this is just hard. Cherish every moment you have with your loved ones... you never know which moment will be the last.



Love

Age Ain't Nothin But a Number... So they say...

I have heard this saying a million times uttered in conversation among family, friends, and I have even heard it put to music. (RIP Aaliyah)

But the question is... how true is it? In the dating arena, does it really matter? And if it matters at all just how important is it?

I'm not sure I have the answer to this question but I must admit that I do think twice when I hear of a 50 year old woman dating a 20 year old man... Or a 80 year old man dating a 22 year old woman. I always think "What could they possibly have in common?" I have been thinking a lot about age lately with my dating and near-dating experiences... Although, I'm always up for a social experiment, I don't think I'm prepared to date a man that is old enough to be my grandfather or young enough to have watched Barney when he was 3 yrs old. I have however always kind of had an unspoken age range in my the back of my head that I felt would be acceptable for me. Of course this range is ever changing with my age... but right now (or lets say pre-a few days ago) my range would look something like my age (29) to about 35. So I have met two guys here lately... And they both just so happen to be basically book ends for my age range. I guess you can say I'm doing a bit of comparison shopping... take a look below for details on them both.

DMV-Dred

• Age: 35
• Status: Single - Never Been Married
• Kids: 2
• Occupation: Operations Manager
• City: Baltimore, Maryland
• How we met: Old Dominion Brewhouse for the 2010 Alabama v FL game
• Pros:
• Attractive
• Gentleman
• Knows how to date
• Shows great interest in person
• Cons:
• Not very consistent communication between dates
• About Him: So we met one weekend. We had pretty good conversation and it was obvious that we both were a bit interested. What sticks out in my mind about that night is that he was such a gentleman. He made it a point to walk me to the train station. I liked that. The next weekend he met me again to watch the games. This time we had drinks afterward... Much more intimate conversation and we went to a nice bar which had a more intimate setting. That was really nice. Nice enough that I agreed to meet him for dinner the next night. I met him out at National Harbor for dinner. We had a nice dinner and more good conversation. It has been pretty good. Good conversation, good company, and pretty good chemistry. We were on a bit of a roll up until my trip to Alabama. I headed out to Alabama witha good feeling about everything and definitely willing to pursue it.

Young Tender

• Age: 26
• Status: Single - Never Been Married
• Kids: 1 
• Occupation: Cust. Serv. and Sales Rep. at the bank
• City: Hoover, Alabama
• How we met: The bank
• Pros:
• VERY Attractive
• Obvious immediate chemistry
• Good listener
• Seems to know what he wants
• Seems mature - kind of unexpected based on age
• Cons: 
• Moves fast (relationship-wise) - takes me out of my comfort zone. Not sure how much of a con this is. 
• Lives in Alabama
• About Him: So I went to the bank on Thursday. One of the first ppl I saw when I walked in was a very cute guy that works there. I was thinking he looked a little young but very cute. I even FB'd about how cute the guy at the bank was when I got back to work. The next day I discovered a banking error related to the transaction I made the day before. I head back to the bank and as soon as I walk in,  the Bank cutie is the first person to approach me. He was very helpful at assisting with my banking issue and with keeping me calm by making me laugh. As we were discussing my issue he gave me his card with his personal cell number written in and said for me to call him after he gets off. Needless to say I did give him a call... between Friday night and texting all day Saturday, we learned a little more about each other. Enough to know we wanted to hang out for the game Saturday night. The chemistry was completely obvious. We talked a lot about our personalities and our dating habits... It went well enough for us to know we wanted to hang out again on Sunday night. I think it went very well. 

So that gives a bit of description about both guys. Now that I am fresh off my trip from Alabama, I'm not sure what I think about either guy... DMV-Dred made it clear that he is looking to settle down at some point but not with as much urgency as Young Tender. This is definitely not a bad thing bc I am still in my comfort zone with him. We are just kind of seeing where things go... with that being said... I think I would need to see more action from him though... Yes the dates are nice but for me to take him seriously I would need to see more action between dates. By that I mean more conversation, outside of setting up the next date.

Young Tender is most fresh on my mind so I think that is why my focus is there. There was a lot of talk around what we are both looking for and how we think we should proceed. It takes me out of my comfort zone bc I am a slow mover when it comes to relationships... To be honest, Young Tender scares me...

So that is it in a nutshell... Good thing I don't have to make a decision now. There are lots of things that are different about both guys... I can't wait to see how this all works out... They both seem like nice, great guys... But will their ages play much into how things go from here... Only time will tell.

Assessments at this point:

Janie: Leaning more toward DMV-Dred... I live in the DMV now therefore most of my time is spent here and it only makes sense to date someone in the same city as you. He seems to be pretty established in his career and that is definitely a good thing. Let's be practical here... DMV-Dred is the best choice.

Hersheys Kiss: Leaning more toward Young Tender. I mean the chemistry is amazing!!! Not to say it isn't there with DMV-Dred but it was nothing like with Young Tender. Even if I do have my reservations, he was saying all the right things and making some good points... Yes, the distance will be hard but who needs to think that far in the future... This is all new... I say follow the feelings... We have enough time for practicality later in life... Young Tender is saying a lot of the right things and is looking as good as he wanna look! LOL! :-)